Giving birth in a pandemic was not what I wanted for my first baby and honestly, I had never been so scared. Going through all of the appointments, scans and worry by myself because partners were not allowed to attend was unbelievably stressful and heart aching. Being told that my little girl isn’t growing well and that she was a concern so needed to be monitored was so ridiculously worrying that I can still remember how my heart would start pulsing as I slowly began to panic more. As I went in for a typical day of monitoring and then to be told that I’m going to be induced because her heart rate was all over the place so it was another concern, was something I kept fearing; going into the hospital and then not to actually be allowed to leave. Oh but wait, actually, it’s alright, not getting induced. My god, that was a rollercoaster of emotions. Now the actual induction day came and it felt like I was waiting around for hours, for anything to be done and well I guess that’s because I actually was. Sitting in the waiting room with a mask on for hours was horrific, the anxiety was creeping massively.
So being induced was something I never had imagined, it felt like I was doing it all alone and I really was trying to stay positive. I hated the fact that my partner couldn’t be there with me through it all but I was just holding on to the fact that he could be there for the actual birth.
On Saturday late evening I started to get a few little twinges while my princess was getting monitored but nothing major until suddenly 2 am and I was in agony. My contractions started and really came on strong. I phoned my partner and got himself down to the hospital car park where he sat and waited. A few hours went by and my contractions were getting stronger and quicker and any pain relief I was getting I just puked up and felt worse. I couldn’t stop crying, I felt so alone and ridiculously scared.
I finally got moved to the next ward and prayed that my partner was allowed to come but he still wasn’t. According to the midwives there I wasn’t having proper contractions because nothing was showing on the monitor and my belly wasn’t going hard or anything. At one point through the night they gave me an injection to stop the contractions so I could sleep but that just made them come back with a vengeance. At 8 am a midwife just starting her shift decided she would examine me and found that I was 7cm dilated and had to quickly get me to the delivery room. My partner was finally allowed to come in and suddenly things were moving so quickly. After getting rushed into a hospital gown I was then strapped back up to the monitor and almost ready to start pushing. As the contractions quickened the time had come, my baby girl was almost here. Panic then hit, her heart rate dropped off the monitor and next thing I know I’ve got 10 midwives around my bed telling me to push this baby out and my partner telling me we needed her out now. Then 9:09 came and my gorgeous healthy little princess was here and everything got better.
